Most of us make New Year’s Resolutions only to see them fall to the way side within a few months. But what if we could take a different approach in creating them – a way that is directly linked to feeling deeply into your heart? One that creates passion, purpose and growth. Would you be in?
Let’s start with the root of the word “resolve” which means to “loosen,” “untie,” or “release.”
If we look at the word resolve from a yogic perspective, resolve is a form of surrender-release, a way to connect with our deepest heart centered desires.
One way to create a heart centered intention is to reframe it into the yoga practice of sankalpa — san meaning “born from the heart,” and kalpa “unfolding over time”.
To create a sankalpa, you’ll need to get clear on what you truly want to bring forward in your life. Ask your heart (yes your heart, not your mind) what it wants. The mind can play some interesting little tricks here and we do not want to start placing the “shoulds” into the mix, otherwise we start “shoulding” on ourselves very quickly.
Answering what the heart truly wants starts with getting quiet in the mind. To quiet the mind, sit or lie in a comfortable position where you can feel deep relaxation throughout body. Focus on your breathing until you feel centered and the mind becomes quiet. Give yourself permission to just be one within yourself and the universe. Take this connected feeling into your heart ask what it wants most in your life. Picture it and feel that it is as already true.
Once you are clear on what your heart truly wants, write down a clear, concise, positive statement using words that are in the present tense.
For example, I want to lose a few pounds this year so that my clothes fit better and that I feel better in them. So one of my sankalpas is: “I eat nutritious whole foods to maintain my best health.” It is a positive statement in the present tense. Not — I need to lost weight so I am going to eat nutritious whole foods – see the difference?
Some great questions to ask yourself to aid in the creation of your sankalpa are:
- What do I want to experience more of in my life?
- What actions can I commit to that are consistent with my heart centered intentions?
- What is the first step I need to take?
Once your sankalpa is established, feel free to revisit it – check in and make sure it still feels relevant. If it doesn’t, get quiet again and see what comes up for you. Remember we are constantly evolving and therefore your sankalpa may evolve too.
Moving one step beyond resolve takes perseverance. In order to maintain our resolve and hold on to our sankalpa, we need to bring awareness into the very moment we are being “tested”. This is where taking a pause, a breath, provides the space to consciously choose whether we honor our sankalpa or follow a different path.
For example, I love potato chips so much so that I could eat a huge bag all by myself in one sitting. Now potato chips are not a nutritious whole food in my book, but none the less I love them and even crave them at times. So when my husband recently brought a big bag home with him and placed them in the cupboard to my surprise, I had to take a moment, a pause and ask myself do I really want these? Is eating these chips in line with my heart’s true desire? By taking a pause, I moved from auto pilot or unconscious behavior into awareness in that moment. Now I could still decide to have some chips and maybe I won’t eat the entire bag or maybe I will say nope not today on hold on to my sankalpa – “I eat nutritious whole foods to maintain my best health.” I chose nope not today. ?
To facilitate this “one-step forward, two steps back” process, it helps to meet any obstacles or tests head on and learn from them, rather than blaming and shaming ourselves when we make a mis-step. By practicing self-forgiveness when you fall off track, you can take responsibility and make the necessary adjustments to get back on track. You shift into a growth mindset which leads to success! I would also suggest building a support system. For example, I asked my husband to please not buy any more chips until I reach my goal for weight loss.
And if you find you are still falling off the wagon, give yourself permission to change course. Don’t waste time on habits that are not working for you. Reevaluate as necessary, and if needed go back to the heart and start over. Only you and your heart know what is truly best for you to create your best life. You got this!